The Milky Way: Beyond the Mirror

Cut from the inverse side, a mirror ceases to be a mirror and becomes a glass.
Mirrors are for looking on this side, and glass is made to look to the other side.
Mirrors are made to be etched.
A glass is made to be cross to the other side...
— Subcomandante Insurgente Marcos, the Former Commander of the EZLN (the Zapatista National Liberation Army), Chiapas, Mexico
What meaning does a human life have if no one has ever seen you?
— Marion Woodman, 8 Ways of Looking at Power: The Power of the Feminine

I'll go you one better.

You have never even seen yourself!

The mirror you think you see in the events of your life is one big fat lie.

It does not reflect who you are, at least not directly. It reflects what was done to you. It reveals the seeds planted in your soul by the painful events of your formative years (and compounded like interest with each passing loss).

In short, this mirror echoes all the ways in which, over time, in the face of your pain, you broke with yourself.

Every single time you try to take a good long look at yourself, a thousand personal demons step between you and your reflection obscuring the marvelous truth about you. Their singular assignment? Make sure you never SEE yourself accurately. Because if you ever do...

Look Out World! 

Consequently, the pleasure you might otherwise take in yourself and your life eludes you. Likewise, it feels impossible to project into the world the truth of who you are and what you came here to do. Plus you just waste inordinate amounts of time fishing for answers in a pond full of distractions.

Tragically, you also forever stop short of making your true mark and of finally having what you honestly desire.  

Basically, you are repentance walking. You search endlessly, with truly admirable dedication, among the distortions of the cynical funhouse mirror for answers:

  • What is wrong with me?
  • Why is love not available to me?
  • Why does this always happen to me?
  • How can I somehow fix myself so this will stop? 

Hush a minute darling! 

You are asking all the wrong questions.  

You ought to be asking how you can clear the view. How you can begin to see the wonderful reality of who you are and the wonderful truth about your very existence... 

You were made for something marvelous!

There is no question about it.

You have a purpose.

There is something you came here to do and this world is starving for it. Maybe not the whole world. But not even the whole world craves pecan pie. If you can imagine that! But for the right people, it's a sell-out pan of must-have. And so are you!

Which brings me to my next point...   

Not only did you come here to do something. You came here to experience something.  

Everything from your brain to your heart to the way your legs and arms can intertwine with those of another reveal this truth:

You were built for love.

You will die without it. 

And don't worry! I am not here to tell you to whip up some positive sentiment about yourself and be done with it. I won't tell you to sit and whisper sweet nothings to yourself in the face of all the disheartening facts of your life, not to mention the garbled image you see whenever, by chance, or by intention, you get a little too close to the fiends in your reflecting pool.


I am here to tell you that you were made to be held, literally ensconced in the wild admiration of YOUR people.

But first, you have to get past these ridiculous questions about why you are not loved. They will only keep you trapped in rotten circumstances trying to make the best of the shit sandwich served up by people who can't see your glorious light. Or worse yet, you'll keep hanging out with people who are trying their dead level best to SNUFF IT OUT.    

Now, don't get me wrong.

I am not talking about some escapist philosophy here.

You must deal with the misrepresentations in your self-considerations. 

There is definitely information to be gleaned from the savage ogres in your mirror. It's just not information about what's wrong with you. It's information about the marvelous aspects of you that are hungering to return home, to realize the full embrace of your heart and their full deployment in service of your dream.

But that's just the beginning.

The moment you have gathered all you need to know from these wild gyrations, you will find that the mirror is of no further use to you. You and your reflection will be one. Suddenly, there will be the transparency of glass, a passageway to the other side; to the place where you can touch and be touched in a glorious, unrestrained dance with other, actual humans.

It's in this place, in this magnificent space, that you will be able to seed and bring to blossoming the true power of your dream (aka your life purpose).

Now, of course, you are here on my website, and you can see I have put a lot into it. So, naturally, I am going to offer you a way forward. I mean, I didn't write all these words just so I could deliver a punch line and ride off into the sunset like some flyboy after a weekend rendezvous.

And so, without further ado, your ticket to the Milky Way (aka the galaxy of love and purpose that exists beyond the mirror and at the end of pointless, self destructive, cruel, inhumane questions)...     

During the dream realization adventure, you will learn to:

  1. Work with the nasty savages in your mirror to discover and recover lost and essential parts of yourself;
  2. Integrate new possibilities;
  3. Fully assimilate your life purpose as a part of your identity;
  4. Move past naval gazing to fulfillment and becoming the solution for someone else; and
  5. Broadcast your inspired work to your people with bat-signal strength. 

Prefer one-on-one, human connection?

Come talk to me instead.

I'm a hoot and I know all kinds of valuable stuff. But mainly, I know how to help you answer the call of your destiny. 

During this call, we will: 

  • Carefully construct your dreamscape (the version of your life where you are living your dream);
  • Contrast it with where you are now (ouch, but so worth it);
  • Discover the obstacles that lie between; and
  • Chart a course for the future you want to create (instead of the one that makes you shiver with disappointment). 

But not for the faint of heart.
— Vanessa Benavides

Still not convinced?

Man, you drive a hard bargain. As well you should! 

Maybe these will help tip the scales in favor of us getting this done together. 

Watch Stop With the Love Already. In this segment, I discuss the ways in which trauma patterns wire into our brains, negatively impacting our ability to identify and choose the love and triumph we yearn to experience. I also explain how a re-patterning relationship can help change this result. 

Click to watch this excerpt from the Monday Mash-Up series. I guide Mark as he retires the Wounded Warrior (with his domination strategies) in the Heart of Love, his own tender heart, and thereby opens up a new path within the Heart of Creation.

Watch Nirmala give in to the temptation to be who she really is as I gently guide her into fully embodying her feminine power and into the powerful creative space of the unknown. This was such a rich, and beautiful experience for me. It was also the finale of the Monday Mash-Up. There will never be another!